s o m e s t a r l e s s n i g h t

Zeus

2009-12-25T00:10:33Z

Into The Wild

2009-12-24T16:52:09Z

Two years he walks the earth. No phone, no pool, no pets, no cigarettes. Ultimate freedom. An extremist. An aesthetic voyager whose home is the road. Escaped from Atlanta. Thou shalt not return, ‘cause “the West is the best.” And now after two rambling years comes the final and greatest adventure. The climactic battle to kill the false being within and victoriously conclude the spiritual pilgrimage. Ten days and nights of freight trains and hitchhiking bring him to the Great White North. No longer to be poisoned by civilization he flees, and walks alone upon the land to become lost in the wild. - Alexander Supertramp May 1992

I admire you, Alexander.

Personality Traits!

2009-12-19T00:30:11Z

Here is a list of quirky personality traits! Bold what applies to you.

I always announce when I have to pee/use the bathroom. I won’t eat my food if it touches a different food. I will not blow my nose in front of other people. I put my feet up on everything. I say hello to everyone I see. I have a tendency to make everything awkward. My mind always wanders to the “sexual” side of things.

I always follow things up with “That’s what she said!”

I’m too embarrassed to ask my friends/family for tampons. I use chapstick/lip balm religiously. I check my accounts online in order every time I get on the computer. If I get up from the computer, even for a second, I put an away message up. I’m always leaving my phone in random places. I always keep on earbud out, in case someone needs to talk to me.

I mark off every day on the calendar.

I have the same routine everytime I take a shower. I will not go out in public without makeup on. Everything about my life is very neat. It has to be. I make a to-do list every day, and I’m lost without it. (usually) I always check my phone the second I wake up.

I have to pee before bed.

I laugh when I hear/see the number 69. I yell "whip" a person when someone disses someone else (or I do). I take off my shoes when I get inside the house.

I can’t stand silence. Especially when I drive.

I have to listen to something or I can’t fall asleep.

I have to have the TV on or I can’t fall asleep.

I don’t use public bathrooms. Period. I will NOT fart in front of anyone. I will absolutely NOT fart in front of my boyfriend/girlfriend. All my music on iTunes has to have album art. (the ones that don’t drive me INSANE) Going a day without changing my underwear, NEVER, EVER happens. I tend to skip showers frequently. I count to 20 (seconds) when I wash my hands. I’m always forgetting to take my pills.

I have panic attacks frequently. The door(s) must be shut before I go to bed. I’m always saying chat lingo out loud (example: “L-O-L” or “W-T-F”)

I swear way too much for my own good. I re-write (or type) all my notes.

Without thinking twice, I always correct spelling/grammar mistakes. I go for weeks without checking my email.

I show up late to work all the time. I number my surveys (in the title).

I number the questions on all my surveys.

.

2009-11-08T21:36:19Z

I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.

- Marilyn Monroe

Dear God

2009-10-10T19:44:53Z

Lord,

Why do you hate me?

Love,
Sue.

P.S.: what do you look like?

Summer

2009-10-06T21:14:12Z

Summer,

I love you. Can you please come back for me?

Thank you.

Much Love,

your dear friend Suzanne G. C. Leusink

Time flies

2009-09-04T22:23:11Z

Time Flies.

Time flies when you're having so much fun. This summer was relaxed, I was mentally preparing myself for the butload of work I have to do this year. Major Exams are coming up this year, which is just great (NOT).
I hate school. I hate its rules, the work, the arrogant kids in my class. I can't wait to get it over with, but at the same time, I'm gonna miss it so much when I leave it. I love this building, the colours, the brightness, some of the teachters and mostly, the friends I only see when I go to school, who I'll probably won't see again after this.
I'm already getting headaches, feeling depressed and biting my lip until it bleeds.
Which just sucks monkeyballs.
Fun fact: I'm going to England. God I can't WAIT! I've been waiting for this for 4 years, and I'm going with, well the whole school but also with my friends Francisca and Sharon which is just gonna be so much fun! I just... I'm terribly excited!
Fanfiction rocks. I found it not too long ago, adore it ever since. I write because I like it, I don't always take it seriously and its actually just practice for me for later, when I'm going to be working in the US as a nanny.
This summer I've been thinking about acting. I love it. I can't get enough of it, I'm creative, not very bright but if I'm motivated (which I am), things work out just fine.
Only, I hate Dutch productions.
I hate the language. I can barely stand it in normal life but the crappy shows suck, its so silly and stupid and there's no talent out there.
I guess I can kiss that dream goodbye.
I'm just gonna focus on playing my lovely Penelope the Ukulele, I adore her (yes thats right, its a she) and its getting better and better. Only, my uke only cost like, 20 bucks and its just crappy.
Mmmmm I guess its good for now.
Tired now, need sleep. Night night.

New chapter Emerald Eyes

2009-07-19T00:26:25Z

Title: Emerald Eyes
Summary: Alice is late for work. Again. She rushes to the subway when she falls and drops her phone in a puddle of water. A guy with familiar emerald eyes saves her phone from drowning. Little does she know this man is going to change her life.

Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5109123/7/Emerald_Eyes

Emerald eyes chapter 3

2009-06-14T10:36:06Z

I spend the next week doing… nothing. When I came home that afternoon my mother was waiting for me… and she wasn’t happy. At all.

She grounded me, even though I let her know that legally I was an adult and that I could do whatever I wanted. But, as she let me know so kindly, I was still living under her roof and now that I lost my job I wasn’t likely to move out.

And I spend the next week doing nothing but waiting for him to call. Yes, I was officially one of those girls. One of those girls who waited desperately for someone she just met to call. Desperate. Ugh.

I had asked my mom if I could go back to the store to ask if my phone was insured, which fortunately, it was. Thank god for that.

After the first two days of boredom I decided to ‘forget’ taking my medication. After a painful breakfast with mom and Cynthia in which the tension was almost overwhelming I took the pills upstairs and I would hold them, crawl back into bed and enjoy the orchestra of dancing jewellery. And soon the choir of make-up would join in.

Yes, I know. Not only was I desperate, I was also pathetic. Great. Like my life wasn’t miserable enough.

It was strangely agonizing, waiting for him to call. Even though I hadn’t really noticed it when we were on our ‘date’ I suddenly felt like I had had a connection with him.

I just hoped he had felt that too.

I was enjoying the orchestra, the choir and the suddenly appearing nail-polish dancers who were dancing ballet when Cynthia sneaked in without knocking. I hid my pills under my cushion and glared at her.

‘Haven’t you ever heard of knocking?’

She blushed and looked down. ‘Sorry.’

I instantly felt bad. What had she ever done to me that was so horrible? I just couldn’t help myself. She and I were complete opposites. She had blonde hair, I had black hair. She had brown eyes, I had blue ones. She had curls, I had my strange spiky hair. She was tall. I was short. She was beautiful, I was not. She was the most perfect child my mother could wish. I was a failure.

‘I just wanted to ask you… do you want me to help you find a job? A friend of mine is well connected… I can ask…?’ Cynthia muttered, and I focused on her again.

‘Why?’ I asked confused. In all these years that we knew each other I had done nothing but snap at her, and be jealous of her. Why was she helping me?

She glanced up and met my gaze. ‘You’re my sister.’ she stated as if that was the most rational explanation in the world.

Maybe it was.

I just stared at her and the orchestra, choir and dancers were obviously getting frustrated at me for not paying attention; they were starting to yell at me.

‘Cynthia! We need to go to the store!’ I heard my mother shriek and I immediately got the Goosebumps.

Cynthia opened the door. ‘I’ll be right down!’

Cynthia turned back to me and smiled hesitantly. I got up and the orchestra, choir and dancers stopped shouting. I glanced back and they turned around and walked down my nightstand, sat down with their backs to me. Great. Now I had to worry about imaginary friends who were disappointed in me too.

I looked back at Cynthia and threw my arms around her. She seemed startled at first but she hugged me back. ‘I’m sorry for being mean to you Cynthia.’ I chocked back some tears. What was wrong with me?

Cynthia patted my back. ‘That’s okay Al. Just remember that I love you, ‘kay?’ Cynthia leaned back to look at me and I smiled at her. She smiled back.

Good. At least that was a start.

I let Cynthia go and she went downstairs where I heard my mom talk to her. And I heard Cynthia snap back at her. I was stunned and I opened the door silently.

Cynthia… snapped at mom? The perfect child… snapped… at… mom?

‘Excuse me?’ I heard my mother say.

‘Why are you keeping Alice locked up like this? She doesn’t deserve it from you y’know.’

I heard my mother snort at Cynthia. ‘Alice is…’ she started but Cynthia cut her off.

‘You know what mom? If you cannot see how truly good Alice is, than I have no need to speak to you. I’m going to the car.’

I was utterly dazed. I had never heard Cynthia raise her voice to my mother. And I had never heard her be there for me. I smiled. It made me feel warm and fuzzy to know that someone was there for me. It felt… nice.

I heard my mom walk up the stairs so I tried to act normal: I quickly turned on my laptop and pretended to be busy. I heard my mother open my door and I glanced up.

‘Don’t you dare leave this house.’ she snapped at me. I just nodded.

As soon as I heard them leave I took my pill for the day, ran downstairs and watched TV. My TV broke a few weeks back and I hadn’t been allowed to watch it downstairs. And even though I had my laptop it wasn’t the same.

I quickly scanned the channels and I saw that Lost was on. I smiled and was really getting into the story… I had always been a fan of drama and I just loved the idea of the show. A group of strangers survive a plane crash on a deserted strange island. It was very intriguing and I soon lost track of time.

I jumped when the phone rang. I laughed at myself and quickly got up.

‘Alice Brandon.’

‘Alice? This is Jasper Hale… if you remember me.’ he sounded so insecure.

‘Jasper! I was wondering when you’d call,’ I said and I was grateful that he decided to

call when mom and Cynthia were out.

‘I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner… I was busy. Do you want to get together soon?’

I bit my lip and closed my eyes. ‘I want to. But I don’t know when I’ll be able to meet you.’ I didn’t wanna say I was grounded. Childish much?

He was silent for a second.

‘What have you been up to?’ I asked, trying to lighten the mood.

‘Not much… I’ve just been busy with painting and playing the guitar. How about you?’

‘Oh I’ve been so bored, you calling is the best thing that happened to me this past week,’ I said as I sat down at the couch again.

We talked until mom and Cynthia returned two hours later. Jasper was so interesting: he played the guitar since he was little and apparently he was very good. I made him promise to play for me some day. And show me his paintings. He told me a little about his childhood: apparently he had a twin sister named Rosalie. She was married to a really nice guy and they just had a baby named Amy. He had a brother named Edward who recently got married. His father was a doctor and his mother used to be an interior designed but she recently quit because her mother got very sick and she wanted to be there for her in her last year. I stifled a snort. Not because of the sweet gesture of Jasper’s mother but because I couldn’t imagine me doing that for my mother.

I got the feeling that talking about Jaspers family was a touchy subject so I moved along and asked about what books he liked. Apparently he loved mystery books and he used to be obsessed with books, movie’s and documentary’s about the Loch Ness Monster. I told him I had a strange obsession with the Titanic when I was 16 and that never really passed. We started to discuss the movie Titanic when I heard a car pull up the driveway.

‘Jasper can I have your number?’ I cut him off. He was just saying that though he liked Jack and Rose he wasn’t sure that a love story should’ve been involved in the movie.

‘Umm sure.’ he said in a confused tone and I ran around the room for a pen and paper. I quickly wrote down his number, said a fast goodbye with a promise I’d call him and hung up. I was about to run upstairs when the door opened and mother came in, carrying two bags. Great.

‘Alice take one of these bags,’ she said roughly and I quickly ran towards her and took one of the heavy bags. Cynthia appeared behind mother and was also carrying a bag.

‘What did you buy?’ I asked curiously as I walked towards the kitchen. Mother raised an eyebrow.

‘You didn’t forget grandma’s birthday, did you?’ she snapped at me. I blinked and cursed myself. Grandma’s birthday… oh no. I looked in the bag and saw everything that you needed to make a cake. I glanced at the calendar. Yeah. Grandma’s birthday was in four days.

‘No… I didn’t forget.’ I stuttered as I saw my mother glare at me. ‘But I forgot to buy a present for her and well…’

‘Fine you can go buy her something this week… if you behave,’ mother said and she started putting things away. I couldn’t help but feel euphoric.

I could see Jasper again. Finally.

Emerald Eyes chapter 2: Miss Alice

2009-06-06T21:35:43Z

‘Are you okay?’

I had the feeling I’d been staring at him for at least 5 minutes. But then again, my mind was still working in slow motion.

‘Ma’am?’ he asked again, nervously. I blinked, and took his hand. It was freezing, but I didn’t flinch away. When I touched him I could feel the scars covering his hand but I pretended not to notice.

The man handed me the soaking wet phone.

‘Thanks,’ I breathed when I took it. He smiled, and it brightened up his face.

He had blonde hair that desperately needed a haircut. I had the strange urge to ruffle through his hair. Focus, I said to myself. I tried to take in as much of this stranger before we would part ways.

His green eyes were beautiful… until I noticed that his pupils were dilated.

I realized I hadn’t let go of his hand.

‘I’m Alice. Alice Brandon.’ I said and I bit my lip. Did I just introduce myself in a James Bond style?

He didn’t seem to notice.

‘Jasper Hale,’ he said in his low velvet voice.

We stood in silence for a second and I glanced at the clock hanging over the entrance of the subway.

It was too late.

I would get fired.

I glanced back at those beautiful dilated eyes and took a decision.

‘Wanna grab a coffee?’ I asked.

He blinked.

Please let him say yes, my heart said. I plucked on a strand of hair nervously while he stared at me strangely.

‘Sure,’ Jasper eventually said.

I grabbed his cold hand. He seemed startled by my spontaneous move but after a moment he smiled.

‘Sorry,’ I said. I blushed and tried to let go but he held me tightly.

‘That’s okay.’ he said and he looked… hopeful? But then his gaze changed.

‘Miss Alice, I am terribly flattered that you would like to drink coffee with me, but I saw you run to the subway… aren’t you supposed to be somewhere?’ he asked and I bit my lip. Should I tell him the truth?

‘I’m supposed to be at work. But they said they would fire me if I was ever late again. And… I am pretty late. Besides, I would rather drink coffee with you,’ I said honestly, thinking I couldn’t blush even more but I was wrong. My cheeks turned a deep red and Jasper suddenly said: ‘That colour looks lovely on you,’ which made me blush even more… what the hell was wrong with me? I never blushed!

I hadn’t realized we were at the Starbucks until Jasper pulled me in the warm store. It was then I realized I was actually freezing. I shivered, and Jasper noticed.

‘Alice? Are you cold? Would you like my jacket?’ he asked concerned.

I shook my head but another shiver ran up my spine. ‘Its fine.’

But he was already shrugging out of his jacket. ‘I don’t want you to catch a cold miss Alice.’

The woman behind the counter raised an eyebrow because it was actually really warm in the Starbucks. But still, shivers ran up and down my spine and I gratefully slid into the jacket that belonged to Jasper. I took a deep breath. His jacket smelled like old cigarettes and faded alcohol.

‘Why don’t you go sit and I’ll order. What do you want?’ he asked in a polite voice.

‘Umm just a cappuccino.’ I said and he smiled at me. My breath caught.

I tried to walk a graceful walk to the table and I was grateful I sort of succeeded.. A man at the next table raised his eyebrows with interest but didn’t say anything.

I looked over my shoulder and saw that Jasper was watching me walk. When he caught my gaze he blushed. I chuckled and slowly sank on the chair.

I watched how the woman behind the counter tried to flirt… I was actually jealous. But I noticed how Jasper only had eyes for me; he frequently glanced at me and made me blush deeper and deeper.

I saw how he grabbed deep into his pocket and got a few dollar bills. He blushed again and I realized he was poor. I felt bad. Why didn’t I notice before? I should’ve paid. I offered to get a coffee. I glanced down guiltily.

When he came over I looked up. ‘I’m sorry,’ I whispered. He didn’t understand me. ‘What’s wrong?’

‘I offered to go drink coffee. I should pay.’

‘Oh no,’ Jasper said and he waved his hand. ‘Its fine.’

When I continued to stare at him with my eyebrow slightly raised he chuckled.

‘Really its fine Alice. Now that you lost your job because of me the least I can do is pay for some coffee,’ he scoffed. I grinned and put my hands around my coffee mug to warm them. He smiled back and bared his teeth. My breath caught again.

‘So Jasper, what do you do for a living?’ my voice shook a little and I blushed again. Such a cliché question. But I hadn’t gone fore a date in… two years. God has it been that long?

But the calmness radiating from Jasper made me feel at ease. Sort of. I was still blushing.

‘Actually, right now, I don’t do anything. Well, I paint, but its not a full time job when no one buys your paintings.’ he grinned sheepishly at me.

‘You paint?’ I asked interested. He grinned back. ‘Only when I’m… inspired.’ he looked away like he’d said too much. I cocked my head.

‘I would love to see some paintings. Maybe even buy one.’ I offered. He gave me a small smile. ‘I don’t know if you’d like ‘em. They’re kinda dark.’

‘I like dark,’ I said and I smiled a devilish smile. ‘There’s a lot that you don’t know about me.’

‘Like what miss Alice?’ Unconsciously, we both started to lean to each other over the table and it made me blush more and more.

‘I have schizophrenia,’ I blurted out and I mentally punched myself in the face. What made me say that? I watched as he widened his eyes but his smile stayed in place. schizophrenia too. If she just stays on her meds its fine, at least, that’s what my mom says.’

‘Really? My aunt has schizophrenia too. If she stays on her meds it should be fine. At least, thats what my mom said.'

I smiled back weakly. ‘I’m on medication but I don’t really like taking it. It makes me woozy and sick. But I don’t like hallucinating so…’

‘What do you see?’ Jasper asked interested. I cocked my head again.

‘Most of the time a pink bunny. Actually I see a lot of things, but they are always in this kind of cartoon version. I’ve seen a yellow deer, singing flowers, love bugs that change colours. Some are even pretty cute. But my mom doesn’t like it when I don’t take my medicine.’

‘I suppose she wants what’s best for you,’ Jasper said politely. I snorted.

‘What?’

‘My mom isn’t really… interested in me. My sister Cynthia is her favourite. I’m a mistake in her sorry excuse for a life.’

‘What on earth makes you think that?’

‘Because she said so.’

Jasper’s eyes widened and I almost giggled at his expression.

‘What kind of mother says that to her child?’ he grumbled. I smiled a little.

‘I wasn’t supposed to hear it. I was seven and hiding behind the stairs.’

Jasper looked absolutely horrified. I looked at the coffee mug in my now warm hands and saw that we were done. Jasper took one more sip of his coffee and then he smiled at me. I glanced at the clock and realized that I’d better call work… if they hadn’t called home yet to ask where I was. God, mom is gonna kill me.

I grabbed a napkin and turned around in my chair to the man that had looked at me with interest. ‘Excuse me sir, do you have a pen for me?’ I blinked my eyes in a flirty fashion, hoping it would work. Apparently it did, and I felt exited by this. I guess I wasn’t as bad at flirting as I thought I was.

‘Sure thing,’ the man coughed slightly and he got a pen from his professional looking bag.

I scribbled my name, well, actually I wrote down Miss Alice, and my number on the napkin and handed it to Jasper. I grabbed my wallet and got a couple of bucks and put it on the table.

‘That’s for the coffee. Call me.’

He blinked and smiled. ‘I sure will miss Alice.’

I smiled brightly before I hopped off the chair, giving the pen back to the man, taking off the Jasper’s jacket and handing it to him, and made my exit, hoping to be graceful again. I guess I pushed my luck because unfortunately I almost tripped in the doorway and I blushed again. When I looked over my shoulder Jasper had cocked his head to the side and was staring at me with an amused expression. I smiled slightly and he grinned back. Though I knew what was waiting for me at home, I couldn’t help but feel euphoric. And for once, I was gonna let myself feel good.

*
Like it? I have a pretty good idea where this story is leading to. Again, realize that English is not my first language and that I've never been to Starbucks and strangely, I've also never been on a date so I don't know how people act on first dates. I tried to make Jasper and Alice seem shy.
Comments are <3

dreamofsunshine @ 2009-06-02T22:49:00

2009-06-02T20:56:46Z

Title: Emerald Eyes. Chapter one.
Characters/Pairings: Alice and Jasper
Category: AU/AH
Summary:

'It was strange that the tiniest detail, the most little things you did in life would change it forever.

For instance,

If I hadn’t overslept

I wouldn’t have rushed to the subway

I wouldn’t have tripped

I wouldn’t have dropped my phone in that puddle of ice cold water

And I wouldn’t have met him.'

Alice is late for work. Again. She rushes to the subway when she falls and drops her phone in a puddle of water. A guy with familiar emerald eyes saves her phone from drowning. Little does she know this man is going to change her life.

I know. I suck at summary's. I always want it to sound mysterieus but it sounds cheesay. Just check it out please and tell me if you like it. This is my fist fic. Be nice please.

*

This fanfic is dedicated to Stephanie (a k a Daddy’s Little Cannibal).

This story is loosely based on Girl Meets Boy.

May you rest in peace Stephanie.

It was strange.

It was strange that the tiniest detail, the most little things you did in life would change it forever.

For instance,

If I hadn’t overslept

I wouldn’t have rushed to the subway

I wouldn’t have tripped

I wouldn’t have dropped my phone in that puddle of ice cold water

And I wouldn’t have met him.

*

I usually never overslept. Still, my boss had warned me, if I even came late again I would have to pay the price… he would fire me.

The reason I was late all the time was because the subway was never on time.

But I had a hard time explaining that to my boss.

So I set my alarm that fateful morning at 6:30. And another alarm at 6.35 am. That way, even if I overslept, I thought, I would still be in time. Boy I was wrong.

My mother would never wake me up if I overslept. I knew that.For some reason she despised me. She adored my little sister Cynthia. Her golden curls, her light blue piercing eyes and adorable face and bubbly personality made her my mother’s favourite.

There was nothing I could do about it.

And then the schizophrenia was discovered by the doctors, and I knew from the bottom of my heart that I would never ever be anything but a failure to my mothers dark blue eyes… the only thing I inherited from her pretty face.

And I gave up.

My father wasn’t there to comfort me, he left my mother when I was seven. The night he left, I was devastated. Not just because I knew he had left not only my mother, but also my sister and I, it was because I knew the reason behind it.

'Oh yes, blame it all on me!' my mother had hissed to him while I hid behind the dark brown staircase.
It was the night after my first symptom schizophrenia. In the supermarket I had had my first hallucination.

I was holding Cynthia's hand while we waited at the cash register next to out shopping cart. Mom had gone to get another kind of fish sticks.
I had to wait by the shopping cart until she came back. Good girl that I was, I did as I was told. Out of the corner of my left eye, I saw something move. I turned around and I saw a pink rabbit, but even more strange, a cartoon bunny, hopping behind the legs of the people in line at the other cash register.

I blinked of course, but the bunny peeked at me from behind a woman’s leg with big brown eyes. I rubbed my eyes and thought I was dreaming. ‘Pinch me!’ I hissed towards Cynthia without taking my eyes of the bunny. Cynthia did as she was told… and she pinched hard. The bunny was still there. So I let go of Cynthia’s hand and followed the bunny. The bunny ran away in the opposite direction and I ran harder… until I bumped into my mother. Her eyes were full of fury.

‘WHY aren’t you with your little sister?’ she hissed and she grabbed my arm… rather painfully. I flinched and I began to explain. ‘Mommy, there was a pink bunny I was following it,’ I said and tears began to fill my eyes.

‘Pink bunny’s don’t exist.’ she hissed to me. Cynthia was still waiting next to the shopping cart, innocence in her eyes.

‘But I know I saw it!’ I raised my voice a little. My mother glared at me.

I simply stared back. I never saw it coming. My mother raised her hand, and slapped me against my shoulder. Hard. I flinched away from her and began trembling. I rubbed my arm. ‘Now be quiet Alice!’ she hissed and she pulled Cynthia in her arms. Cynthia stared at me and my mother with wide open eyes of shock.

‘I do not have the time and patience for your crazy ideas. Pink. Bunny’s. Do. NOT. Exist. And now shut your mouth and help me with the groceries. How in gods name could you leave your three year old sister alone in a supermarket…’ she started hissing again and I blinked away the tears. I looked away, and a set of green eyes caught my gaze. It was a boy. He was about 10 years old and had wavy blonde curls that were combed back over his head.

His looked at me questionably and he seemed to measure my expression. He sighed, and then he smiled. His whole face lit up and I couldn’t help but smile back. He was standing next to a woman with the same blonde curls but she had big brown eyes that looked like she had seen too much in her life she never wished to see. She seemed… poor.

Her clothes were stained and worn out. I looked at the boy. His jeans were stained even more but he looked cleaner than his mother. His hand clutched on to a girl that was clearly a twin sister. She had the same gorgeous green eyes and even at her young age she looked absolutely beautiful. She wore a red shirt that brought out her green eyes and she had long legs for her age. When I smiled she didn‘t smile back. She stared at me with a bored expression.

I wanted to smile at the boy again, but my mother grabbed my arm and I flinched again. I never had the chance to look at the smiling boy with the green eyes again.

That night at precisely 11 o’clock at night my father left.

After my mother hissed towards him (she hissed a lot, I noticed that that night), he glared at her with a death glare that made me scared. Really really scared. I had never seem my father as a dangerous man. But he truly terrified me.

‘Like I wanted her,’ he yelled towards my mother. It froze me in place.

‘It was not my fault I got pregnant. You didn‘t want to wear a condom!.’

‘But you wanted to keep her.’

‘You wanted to get married!’

‘The most horrible mistake of my life.’ he said with a voice full of hatred.

I was still frozen. I knew they were talking about me. I was only seven. How could they talk about me like this behind my back?

Tears started to fill my eyes and I ran to my room when my mother hissed: ‘Fine. Leave and do us both a favour.’

I never saw my dad again.

Not that I really desired to.

But getting back to the day I met him.

I overslept… how I managed to do it I still have no clue. I had even set 2 alarms. I slept through both.

I hurried downstairs at 7:15 with my shirt pulled half over my head. I had no time to fix my hair. Spikes of inky black hair stood out straight at the sides of my face.

I hated it.

‘Why didn’t you wake me?’ I hissed in a loud voice to my mother who was watching the news. She glared at me.

‘You wanted to drop out of college. You wanted to get a job. You should get up in time.’ she snapped.

I stared at her for a second. Didn’t she realize I dropped out of college for her? That I took that job… for her? Because she had money problems? Why did I even expect her to? She never saw what I did for her. I shook my head and I grabbed my shoes from under the coffee table. I ran back upstairs and glanced at the clock.

Crap! I thought and I ran upstairs to get my bag. I grabbed my pink phone of my night stand and I ran downstairs again. My mother didn’t even glance up when I ran past her. I sighed again and I closed the door a little louder than I intended to. I immediately noticed that it was cold… not only cold, it was freezing. I breathed and a cloud so think no one could even look through it left my mouth. I shivered but I didn’t feel cold… my heart was thumping loudly and the adrenaline shot through my veins. Then I realized I had forgotten my jacket.

Damn! I cursed myself but I didn’t turn around. I shot around the corner and I raced towards the subway.

O Lord in heaven I will ask you for one great thing… please let me have one great thing in life… please let me make it on time to work… I pleaded when I glanced at my phone again. I’m so screwed.

It was 7:45. I had to be in the office by 8:15. The train trip alone took at least 35 minutes, let alone the 10 minutes I had to walk.

I groaned in frustration when it happened.

I skidded over some water that had frozen during the night. Everything seemed to happen in slow-motion. I began to fall, and my left arm shot out to soften my fall. But it knocked my phone out of my hand and it literally flew into the air and landed with a soft splush into a puddle of water that hadn’t frozen during the night.

My heart skipped a beat in horror.

I was nothing without my phone.

I stared at the spot where my phone had vanished from sight.

A pale hand, covered in small to big scars shot out in front of me and dove into the puddle. The pale hand appeared on the surface again and it held something soaking wet. My dearly beloved pink phone.

I stared at it. The hand opened the phone and the water came pouring out of it.

My heart skipped another beat.

‘Ma’am?’ a low voice said.

My head shot up and I was caught in a gaze of strangely familiar emerald eyes.

‘Are you okay?’

Liked it? Yes? No? Maybe? Did those Lost fans amongst us notice the 8:15 reference? No? Thats okay. It wasn't on purpose.But I kinda like that its in there, hehe.Also, if you noticed some grammar mistakes, that's because English isn't my first language. I especially have problems with Then/Than.
Comments are <3

Claire Drawing

2009-05-13T17:26:28Z

How the drawing turned out.

From the beginning to the end.

Like it?

Writer's Block: What is your name?

2009-04-09T16:27:44Z

If you were to have another name, what would it be?

Submitted By crazyprotein

View 503 Answers

It would be: Juliet Rush.
Because I love the name Juliet and I took the last name Rush from August Rush, because of his musical miracles.

Jasper and Madison

2009-03-20T23:31:01Z

I thought every single vampire thought I was repulsive.
Yesterday, in a fierce battle, my shirt was ripped from his body and I had felt everyone's emotions. After the first shock, I had felt the repulsion. The scars that marked every single centimeter of my body made them sick.
I was sitting with my head to my knees in the dark chamber. The newborns stayed away from me, still repulsed by my appearance. I closed my eyes, and tried to block them out unsuccesfully. But then I felt something. Respect.
It was completely new. I had never, ever, felt respect towards me. Not from Maria, not from my newborns, anyone. I raised my head and searched for the source of this unknown emotion. I looked to my left and saw her.
She was beautiful, as all vampires were. But she was different. She was tall, and very thin. Beauty radiated from every inch of her body: from her black curly hair, her big red eyes, her full dark-pink lips to her tiny, petite feet, covered in black boots.
She was wearing a white shirt, wich was very different from all the black in the room. Her jeans were dirty, but it made her look human. I watched her stare at me, with respect, and then she got to her feet and was sitting next to me in half a second. I felt the newborns reaction. Disbelieve, shock. They all stared as the girl, who looked about 17 years old, took my right arm, and she ripped of the sleeve. Normally, I would never have allowed this. I would have torned the girl apart way earlier, just for staring at me. But she was different: her black long curls touched my neck as she moved closer to me, and I could feel het emotions: thick, very thick respect, admiration, even a frienschip. I had never noticed her before in my vampire life, but she had noticed me.
Het long finger trailed over the scar wich Maria had given me after one of the newborns had attacked another one and I hadn't been in time to stop them, they had slaughtered each other on the spot. The girl bend over, and I could hear everyone gasp, as did I, when the girl gently pressed her cold full lips to the scar.
She looked into my startled eyes, and a delicate but beautiful smile spread across her face. 'I'm Madison Curtly.' she said. Her voice was high, and very attractive.
I forced myself to awnser. 'Jasper Whitlock,' I said, formally, as a good soldier. Not one vampire I knew used his last name, exept for me.But Madison used hers too. Curtly. Madison Curtly. I was used and attached to my last name and no one could take it away.
She smiled again, and pressed her lips to another scar from a newborn slayes moments after he had attacked me on my wrist. Feeling her lips on my skin made me feel happy, I realized. I closed my eyes, and my head leaned back in pleasure.
Then I heard a small scream, and Madison was ripped away from me. Shocked, I opened my eyes. Maria was holding Madison by her long hair. Madison looked at me terrified. Maria, however, was furious.
'I cannot let you be distracted like this,' she spitted out, and shook Madison by her hair. I quickly got to my feet, but my eyes did not tear away from Madison's. Her eyes looked pleading. I could feel her emotions. She knew Maria. She was terrified. Scared to death.
'You are lucky to be alive Jasper Whitlock. You need no other woman in your sorry excuse for a life, than me.' I finally looked at Maria. She was becoming more and more furiated, and the other newborns crawled into a dark corner. They were terrified too.
'So, for your little friend here,' Maria said curtly. A tiny smile spread across her face and half a second before she did it, I knew what she was going to do. So did Madison. She screamed, scared to death, and then I heard the metal. If I were human, it would have shot shivers across my spine. But I wasn't. I could only watch in horror how Maria tore Madison's head of and threw her into the large fire that was centered in the middle of the room. Smoke filled the room, but no one cared. I stared at Maria in schock, and she walked over to me, and grabbed the neckline of my shirt. She smiled, but still anger in her eyes, and she pulled me with her. And, good soldier that I was, I followed her.
I would have another scar by sunrise. .

06-03-2009

2009-03-06T20:06:04Z

Tomorrow a French girl, who's name I won't mention, will come to Holland to stay with me and my family for a week. It's part of a project of my sister's school: she allready went to France.
The girl is very, very nice, and I'm really looking foward to having her here, altough she doesn't speak English that well.
Still have to clean my room.
Damn, I hate cleaning my room.
xx

Alone

2009-03-02T19:31:10Z

*

I woke up early that morning. The sun was barely up.
The thing that had woken me was my unborn baby, who felt I needed a good kick in the ribs.

I sighed, feeling so pregnant these days, and I sat up, arching my back painfully. I glanced down the beach. Everyone was still asleep. I saw the brother and sister, who always fought, sleep tightly together, the man with his arm around the girls waist. They may fight allot, I thought, but they really do love each other. I felt a sting in my stomach, wich may also had been caused by the footballer, that I had never felt that kind of love.

Sure, I loved my mom, and Thomas... but never in that way. Brothers and sisters can fight all they want, but in the end, they belong together. I glanced further down the beach. I saw Jack's tent, he was sleeping softly no doubt about that. The hero... Nothing was worrying him. And I saw Kate, snuggled under a plane blanet. I also saw Sawyer poorly set up tent. He was sleeping softly too. Everyone was sleeping exept for me and a small figure against the horizon. I blinked my eyes once.

Charlie stood with his feet in the water, glaring at the barely sizen sun. I watched him silently from a distence... He looked so small. I kept looking. His long sleeves had been ripped from his jacket but he still seemed hot. Sweat drops made their way down his face and his hands twitched noticably.

I glared once again, then I felt like a peeping tom so I stood up, slowly, caused by the huge lump in front of me, and I waggled down the beach to him. I kept my eyes on him, and he seemed so... lonely.
It was the way he stood. It was hard to explain, but I could see he had had a long, long life.
I stopped a few feet behind him. 'Hey Charlie,' I whispered just loud enough. I didn't wanna wake the korean couple who slept just a few more feet away. Charlie looked back, startled, and then he smiled, if just a little. 'Hi luv. Why are you awake so bright and early?' He grinned wider.

I didn't know why, but when he grinned so sweetly at me, I felt butterflies in my stomach. This confused me. Why was this? Was it the baby? I rubbed my stomach, but the baby wasn't moving at the moment. I frowned slightly. I hadn't felt butterflies since... Thomas. Strange. I walked towards Charlie and my bare feet got immediately soked in salty water. We stood beside each other for a few second, untill I realized he had asked me something. 'Oh uh... the baby kicked me awake,' I stuttered. I frowned even more.
Why was I stuttering? Charlie glanced a peek at me, with his big blue eyes.

I felt the butterflies again, but then I noticed something. He was really sweating, he had dark cirkles under his eyes and his hands were twitching even more now. 'What's wrong?' I asked, startled by his sick figure. He looked at me and he seemed so tired. 'Nothin' luv, don't worry about me, how are you feeling?' he said, trying to change the subject, but I didn't bite. 'Your sick Charlie. Come on. I'll take you to the docter.' I said, and I grabbed his hand. He didn't move, but he didn't let go of my hand either, and that made goosebumps on my arm and I was beginning to feel warm.

'Jack knows whats wrong with me...' Charlie muttered, still holding my hand. 'He has no drugs for me. I don't want any drugs.I have to kick this... sickness myself.' Charlie said, and he let go of my hand. It flopped against my side. 'Still, you have to go and lie down. Charlie, look at me. Your really sick. Come on,' I grabbed his hand again, and this time, he let me pull him to my tent. He noticed.

'Your tent?' he asked, frowing. I glared at him. 'Do you have a tent?' I asked and I felt that my feet were getting sticky with sand because of the water on my bare feet. We arrived at my tent 'Touché...' he muttered and I pushed him into the plane chair. He looked at me, curious. 'So how are you going to cure me nurse?' he asked innocently.

I grinned smugly at him and I turned around. 'Lets at least get you something to eat,' I murmerred. I grabbed two banana's and turned around. Charlie leaned back with his head against the headrest and he was snoring softly. This startled me. I hadn't realized he was so tired. My hands dropped against my sides.

Then I walked to Charlie and removed his warm vest, trying to get him to cool down a bit. I could smell his sweat, but it wasn't like a smelling kind of sweat. I sniffled once, and hung the jacket over the wash-line.

Then I went to sit down in the chair next to Charlie. He was wearing nothing under his jacket and his soft stomach was drenched slightly in sweat. It sparkled in the sunlight.
I pealed one of the banana's and kept watching him. He breathed in slowly in and out. I smirked a little. I really like Charlie, I thought. I grabbed my diary and a pen and started writing.

26 December 2004.
Dear Diary.
Charlie is sick. I don't know what he has, but it seems like the flu. I want to make him feel better, but I don't know how. Maybe if Sawyer or Jack wake up I can get convince Charlie to take some asperine.
But today I realized I really like Charlie. There's something about him thats just so adorable and sweet. And even in a scary place like this, he makes me feel safe.
The baby is kicking my guts out right now. Why, oh why, must I have a abbusive baby growing in my fragile uturus? I can barely walk!
I remember, Charlie really likes feeling my baby kick...

I dropped my pen, my eyes lingering on the last scentence. Charlie really likes feeling my baby kick.
I dropped my diary and pen, and hesitantly, I took one of Charlie's hands and placed it gently on my stomach. Maybe this would make him feel better.

I glanced at Charlie, and to my suprise, even unconciously, he smiled.

Another one!

2009-02-17T18:04:11Z

Its just so hilarious!

17-02-09

2009-02-17T17:56:12Z

My birthday was AWESOME! There weren't allot of people, but it was allot of fun. I got a dvd player, camera, sex and the city season 3, money, a mirror shaped as a horse, and some other cool stuff.
I just found out you can do this, and isn't it just OMG so adorable?

Even though I do hate the picture I used, I LOVE IT!
go to www.faceinhole.com and make one yourself, for those who read this. Kisses!

dreamofsunshine @ 2009-02-11T21:31:00

2009-02-11T20:34:21Z

I just love this picture. My blue eyes really stand out. It's a pretty old picture, but still... My hair is pretty blonde and my eyes look good with the green background. I like this one. Time to show it off!!

I Wanna Be Alice Cullen

2009-02-10T16:20:01Z

O My Gosh, I so wanna be Alice Cullen! These are the reasons:
1. She is pretty
2. She is tiny (I am friggin huge! Not normal! I can never walk on heals!)
3. She is so graceful!
4. She is so happy all the time! People say to me: 'Why are you always so chearful?' But I don't see it that way... I have a very bad temper... anyways...
5. She has Jasper Hale as her boyfriend. And if you haven't noticed: Jackson somethingsomething, the guy who plays Jasper, IS SO CUTE!

Sacred

2009-01-27T22:53:10Z

Dorothy was just a young child and had never killed anything in her life.
-The Wizard Of Oz

Charlie was lingering around the beach, grabbing random suitcases, flipping them over and tossing the usefull stuff on a pile next to him.

Then something caught his eye. A handsome tall man was walking next to the image of a very pregnant beautiful girl with a huge stomach.

Sawyer and Claire.

Charlie stared at them for a minute. Claire was obviously talking fast with a huge smile spread across her face and Sawyer anwsered her with a huge smile too. Charlie never knew he and Claire got allong so well.

There was no need to be jeleous.

I mean, I’m not the father of her child, not her boyfriend. Not… anything. I’m barely a friend. I mean, she is probebly the nicest girl I’ve ever met, but no, a drug addict and a pregnant girl should not mix. No, this is for the best.

He muttered to himself, trying very hard not to look up again at Sawyer and Claire. He was just throwing a nail-clipper at the usefull pile when temptation won over him and he glanced down the beach, just for half a second. He was suprised to see Claire wandering towards him as fast as she could with her huge belly. She was looking red and angry and Sawyer was watching her walk towards Charlie with a stunned face. Sawyer hoovered for a second, staring at Claire first and then the rock he was standing by, then he shrugged and he went back to his spot at the beach.

Claire was breathing heavely when she arrived at Charlie and her face was even more red. She was muttering to herself angrily and she wriggeled with her fingers.

She flopped down next to Charlie and Charlie looked at her face, very amused.

‘Wat’s wrong?’ he finally asked and he threw a white bra in the huge mass of suitcases. It dissapeared immediatly.

Claire seemed so angry she couldn’t even speak. She breathed heavily for a few times, then she hit the sand with her fist so suddenly that Charlie flinched.

‘Sorry. It’s just… ugh, men can be so… so… ugh!’ Claire hit the sand again, and again, making the sand flees jump up on Charlie. He slapped his shoulder immediately.

‘Sorry.’ Claire whispered. Charlie laughed at her again, still amused by her anger. It was so hard to believe that a porcelain doll like Claire could get so angry.

‘What did Sawyer do?’ he asked, wondering. What on earth had Sawyer said?

‘Um, no, nothing really. It’s not that its just… ugh!’ she yelped again.

‘I’m glad that’s clear.’

‘No, he… y’see, we were walking, everything was fine, then this spider crawled up on this rock and, well, I’m afraid of spiders, allot actualy. But, I guess Sawyer saw me flinch, and he just… BAM! stepped on the poor thing,’ Claire whispered at the end.

‘Sawyer shouldn’t have killed him, he could’ve just… picked the poor guy up and throw it somewhere else, I mean, just killing it… Ugh! The stuff was everywhere!’ Claire yelled mortified.

Charlie couldn’t stop grinning. He tried to hide it unsuccesfully.

‘What?’ Claire eventually asked, rubbing a spot on her tummy.

‘You just… I’t so suprising that you’re so upset about just a spider.’

‘Every life is sacred, even the life of a spider, Charlie. First lesson of Buddism.’ Claire said wisely and she patted her belly.

‘Hmm… never looked at it that way. That’s a interesting way of looking at an ugly, filthy scary spider.’ Charlie grinned at Claire again, and she smiled too, if just a little.

‘Ah… well… he’s dead now anyways. The spider, I mean. There’s nothing I can do about it now…’ she mumbled and she smiled at Charlie.

‘Want some help?’ she asked and she pulled a brown suitcase towards her and opened the zipper. Charlie glanced at her. Her blonde hair fell over her shoulders and her pink lips were very dry. She looked so tired, but still so beautiful.

Well, your life is certaintly sacred.

TONIGHT!

2009-01-21T17:06:42Z

TONINGT! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!

dreamofsunshine @ 2009-01-16T21:34:00

2009-01-16T20:39:50Z

My birthday is on Valentinesday and I have a whole list of presents that I ask:

My Parents:
-Computer (wich I'm never gonna get)
-A Seeying Eye Dog to raise for a year (The dog will never be allowed in the house, cuz we have a cat)
-A Mouse ('There will never be a mouse in this house!' yells my dad)
-A Fish (Not the best idea (cat))
-Rings, necklaces and moneyyyyy!

My sister:
-A painting (like she did last year)

My brother:
-Chocolatéééééé (yummy)

My neighbours:
-Moneyyyyyyyyyy

My aunt and uncle:
-the movie Twilight (LOVE)

My aunt:
-either moneyyyyyy or rings

My old neighbours:
-moneyyyyyyy

My other aunt and ucle (& young baby nephew)
-A hint for the baby's name
(my aunt is pregnant (Its gonna be a girl) and the person who guesses the name of the baby will win 20 euro's! I can really use the money...)

MONEEEYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!

dreamofsunshine @ 2009-01-14T16:39:00

2009-01-14T15:50:40Z

The teacher for VAP is so stupid! She kept us for like half an hour in the classroom because 'the class isn't clean enough'. Jeez! It was friggin clean! I got sooooo frustrated! So did the rest of my class! Eventually she got a call from the other teacher for VAP who told her he let his class go like 45 minutes ago. So my teacher let us go too, but I really wanna be in that other class. A friend of mine is in that too, so I wanna be there.
O my gosh, I'm watching My Super Sweet Sixteen, and they are so fucking spoild! O my dear lord!
'Mom, I don't want that car! You're embarresing!' *crie crie*
I have a pretty short to do list today, thank God!
^Learn German
^page 17 to 23 from Biology
^watch Tila Tequila season 1 at 22:10 MTV
^Think of a birthday present for my friend Fran
Nothing more!
Yay!
xx

Overslept

2009-01-13T17:55:28Z

I totally overslept this morning! Not big time, but I woke up at 07:42 this morning. Way to late. And I wasn't the only one. My mom too, she got to work just in time. Tomorrow I have VAP, wich is, lets just say it: cooking. I can't believe I actually picked the stupid thing. Why could'nt I just have picked something like, I dunno, with animals? I love animals!
I think why I didn't pick it was totally the fault of mr. Boerstal, who broke my faith in that class by telling me that you'll only hold an animal like, 2 times in the year. And I didn't want that. I wanted more.
I'm having the most difficulty finding an internship spot at a daycare. I guess they don't want high school kids walking one step behind them for a week. I'm just gonna have to find something else. Gotta go. Only zeven days left to the premiere. Can't wait!
LOST RULES!
x